i am

Being a quite sensitive person, Ive always been afraid of changes cuz i hate so much to let go something im comfort with and I’m afraid to get hurt. So i try very hard to not change a single thing about myself and things around me for the so called perfect world.  People around me. Places that I stay. Jobs that i know i could handle well. Dressing style that I’m so used to.  Even my face washing foam I’ve been using it for  4 years cuz I’m afraid that the other products might cause allergic reaction to my sensitive skin.

But i find it somehow, life is hard to control – our singular life is always full with plural unexpected changes. Event though i continue to use the trusted superior Dermalogica, sometimes for the sake of stress and sleepless night i still get unwanted dots on the face. And the fact is, there’s no perfect world out there. This year 2011 speaks for itself. My life changed a lot. At one point i just thought that ” Shit, everything is messed up. Or rather, Shit, I messed up everything! “  Thought it’s gonna be a Hard-To-Bear 2011 but in the blink of an eye, Hey it’s already December, and I’m doing Good. Real good. =]

I used to wait and hesitate when im doing decision cuz I doubt if the readiness for any move is  there. I made a venture this year. It was kinda tough but surprisingly i won. - Thanks to May.

 I used to ask myself  ” Why I’m always different from the others? ” And now i know, ” Why do i have to be the same like others? ” So i made the most dramatic move ever ( well not that dramatic actually but quite a big change) in my life and im happy.  - Thanks to Jun and July. *Thanks to Mr. Joe Sidek*

I used to stay in a larger house, now a smaller one, but closer to the lovely swimming pool. (not a big deal but it is a change :p)  -  Thanks to August. * Of course thanks to my sister and brother in law*

I used to complain but not doing anything to improve what ever I’m complaining, so now i shut my mouth up and  start the real work, healing life with hope. – Thanks to September * Thanks to Mom and Dad* 

I used to be afraid when relationship turns sour, i still afraid of it now, but learning how to accept it. Some people are getting further from me, but some are coming closer. Fair enough rite. If one day any relationship is over, that’s when we need to learn the moment ” When only memory remains..” – Thanks to December 

Still lotsa good and bad changes happened throughout the year but i guess pretty enough for now. The thing that i learned is, our journey has molded us for the greater good. Every changes were exactly what they needed to be. And it took each and every changes we encountered to us to the now. So even though sometimes life is a struggle, it’s still beautiful.

I’m still kinda sensitive BUT. will get stronger tougher and will be brave.

Hi 2012. I’m waiting for you! =)